Room For Debate:

In this paper I collaborated with two other students, whose work I admire: Kylie White and Arthur Gandy. We all have an array of different schedules so planning time to work together face to face was difficult. Thank God for technology. Kylie was able to create a Google doc to where we could work at the same time or independently. Art is home during the day with his children while Kylie and I are at work so some of our time was spent during these hours creating ideas and speaking through text. Art and I spent a few hours working on it during a Saturday. He worked on the background portion as I worked on the mental health section. Kylie created a thesis statement that conveyed the idea that took us four days to come up with. With the topic of gun control, so many avenues can be taking and between the three of us the amount of research obtained was frankly overwhelming. We texted late night, early morning, and throwing ideas each other’s way periodically throughout the day. It was exhausting trying to keep up with all three of our thought processes. We did compromise with the mental health and what we saw as a vision. I myself thought more firmly with mandating, but information researched by Art that changed my view. I do not think we struggled as most may with writing one perspective from three individuals. Most of our thoughts were already at the same pace. Kylie and Art are the two people I run to in class when I question my work and receive honest, thoughtful feedback. I was lucky to be asked to work on this paper with them, and look forward to future collaborations.

Memoir:

My memoir assignment was difficult. Professor M. told me with my extensive blogging I would have so much information this assignment would be cumbersome. As a matter of fact it was. I went through each section of my blogs, copy and pasted them into a word document and re-read every one of them. I was looking for that moment that my writing already displayed visual details. So the bulk of the showing writing was already done. I found my moment while doing my found poetry assignment. I highlighted it then moved on to finish one assignment at a time. I revisited my reflection week 4 several times. I remembered how much emotion I was generating during a time of high stress. How embarrassed I was for showing my emotions to others, even if it was my husband, and crying uncontrollably. I chose that moment because I had passion while writing, but still reserved the imagery of my feelings. I took a risk by expanding that dark time I went through, and opening up to show others how it truly felt from the inside out. Going back and elaborating took me in my mind to a time that I was broke and felt unfixable. As I concluded the paper I realized how valuable time with my family was. Stepping away from life’s daily routine, with the ones I love the most, saved me from a deeper, darker path. I am happy I chose to write about this moment because I got it out in words, understood the full timeline before I busted open, and found my fix with my loved ones.

 

 Home:
Today is the day after my Thanksgiving feast. I was able to take off Wednesday 11/25/15 and my son Anthony and I did all the baking. We made chocolate chip cookies, two pumpkin pies, monkey bread, sweet corn bread, and a carrot cake. The next morning, Thanksgiving Day, my feet hit the floor a little later then I liked, but I was headed towards the kitchen to get the coffee started. I pulled out my 22lb turkey for 30 minutes or so. My mother woke up and started her stuffing. She had to get the neck bone, heart, and liver out. I am in the medical field, but sticking my hand up a turkey’s ass just isn’t for me. As she did that I started the prep on the sweet potatoes. Peeled, boiled, and put them into a pan with light brown sugar, honey, cinnamon, nutmeg, and syrup. Covered them with aluminum foil and into the fridge for later they went. After, I started the green beans. I pulled out the two huge ham hocks and put them into my soup pot, poured the beans, special seasons and chicken broth, and then they were left to simmer for the duration of the day. The turkey was finally stuffed, put some season on the big bird, and into the oven at 325 degrees for the next 6 hours. I took a coffee break. It may not sound extensive, but it was early and my head hurt already. Coffee break was over and back to the kitchen I went. My daughter and husband were too busy watching the Thanksgiving Day Parade to miss me. I started peeling the potatoes for mashed potatoes. My mother states you cannot have instant potatoes on Thanksgiving. Put the potatoes into a boiling pot of water and let them cook. As that was finished, I pulled out my ham and put it in the convection oven. I saturated the already marinated ham in brown sugar and syrup. It was already cooked so just needed a heat to help the seasons infiltrate the pig. The potatoes were finished so I dumped milk, salt, butter and chives and hit them with the blender. At that time, my husband made an observation that my mac and cheese with bacon is not in the crock yet. I told him that was not on the menu, so he took it upon himself to do his own mac and cheese. It was fabulous. I started the cheese tray cutting up cheddar, sharp cheddar, and jack. I aligned them perfectly next to 3 rows of regular town house crackers, parmesan cheese pretzel crackers, and plain pretzel crackers. As I put them on the coffee table our first guests arrived. My daughter greeted my aunt and uncle with
“Come on in the party is started.” She cracks me up. One by one our guests arrived and we had a total of 15. My father in-law started getting grumpy so we feed him some bourbon and he seemed to simmer down. All in all two families came together and no one fought…too bad.

In a previous post reflection week 4, I used the following telling language to explain a moment from my life:
A friend of our family has a property that has a huge pond. In that pond lives the biggest, most beautifully colored coy fish I have ever seen. Some with black and white markings, others with the brightest orange and white, one even looks like a tiger with his stripes. There are also two pre-historic large turtles.
Here, I will revise this telling language into a scene that shows readers this same moment from my life:
            Among the murky green pond, live two turtles so large they are almost prehistoric. Sharing the residence of the algae ridden water is coy fish, around 10 of them, with the most interesting colors ever visualized on an aquatic animal.
 
Class:
Well this past week I had my first anxiety attack that did not affect the others around me. I was actually quite happy that I did not go into a full freak out. The amount of work assigned was overwhelming to say the least, but I get why. We were assigned to do the first draft of the one-semester memoir, blogs #20-23, revise both our adaptive mindset papers, and room for debate. AHHHHHHHHH!!!! We went more in-depth with logical fallacies, and thanks to the Purdue Owl website I have a better idea and was actually able to identify some that my partners and I had used. I believe we used some slippery slopes, and post hoc ergo propter hoc. Professor M. was able to provide some help in avoiding using logical fallacies. For example, he kept repeating to stay specific, stick to issues and use precise wording, do the research to back the claims. I guess I did not realize how many times in our paper we state If ….happens, then …will happen. I see it better now. However, my grasp is not 100% as I continue to educate myself, so Ben your my contact! We discussed in class showing and telling writing, as you can see from my previous version of correction I still have some issues identifying the two. As I understand it to be, showing writing is writing that is detailed enough the readers imagination can read between the lines of what is being said, vs the telling writing that gives the vivid details outlining what you want the reader to see. I know in my writing I am very descriptive and in just a few sentences I can show and tell. A good narrative, as explained by Professor M. is 80% showing and 20% telling. Showing consists of strong details, setting a scene, providing action and thinking in terms of images. Telling is providing information, context, and background. Giving the reader what they are unable to discover from showing sentences. We watched a few movies to drive the concept home; Jerry Maguire, Ferris Buhler’s Day Off, and Good Fellas. I love all of these movies, but have never analyzed the scenes using a writer’s lens. Professor M. had us identify showing and telling in the scenes and I got 1 out of 3 correct. I can see both in most writing and visuals. I feel I may struggle with this as sometimes my writing is so descriptive, and through my descriptions I feel like I am showing. I don’t know, but hopefully once I start my rough draft of my one semester memoir I can nail it down. We did discuss the key points to the paper of sorting through our blog posts, picking one event, and developing that moment. Well as he told me in our mid-term conversation I have a lot of material. I have printed my blogs, as I used them for my found poetry assignment, and as I was sorting through I have chosen a few moments that I could very well expand on and easily create a 1000 word essay. The showing and telling part might be a little more of a battle. I have not done the necessary readings for this assignment to date, but plan to read all of them and possibly re-read. I need to be as true to the story as I remember. To create my paper I need to give information with creative writing and keep the reader interested in a moment from my little boring life. At least this is what I think at this point, my writing always seems to change as I start. I will have my little plan and next thing I know I am out in left field. Fortunately, I will be able to re-visit this blog to see where my thoughts were when I was still on the outside of the paper.
 

Home:
It has been a crazy week to say the least. I feel this time of the year I am stretched very thin. Since buying our home in 2012 we have hosted Thanksgiving. The first year I did everything myself for 20 family members. It turned out great, but I was prepping for over a week. Last year, I had everyone make and bring something to help with the stress. Coming from a large family, each one likes to comment to me “don’t let her make that nasty ….”, but they like to make it so I have a hard time saying no. We had way too many left overs, and the raccoons ate great for a few nights. This year, I was hoping to tailor what my family would bring. It started with my crazy Aunt who raised me. “What would you like to bring to my house for Thanksgiving this year?” Her response was classic. “I cannot make anything hot because I like to make my own Turkey and my oven will be occupied. I can make coleslaw.” Ok so now we are going to have a Fourth of July covered dish. Great! “Can you make biscuits?” She replies “I can buy a pack of Hawaiian rolls.” No problem I thought, my grandmother will make something good. My grandmother  has had a bad cut on her ankle for months, and due to her arthritic medications it will not heal. So she decided to stop 3 years of progress on the arthritis medications to help the wound heal. Needless to say she has been in the hospital 3 times this week between her unsealing wound, and pain I cannot begin to imagine. I will not ask her to make anything. This is also the first year my in-laws will join us. My mother in-law was always running the cash office for Kohl’s and had to be in Black Friday at 2am. She would go to sleep by 4pm on Thanksgiving night. I cannot ask her to make or bring anything. My mother currently lives with me so she will be already assisting me in the prep. With no one willing to offer, and me not wanting to ask for assistance, I have decided to do it all by myself.
The Menu:
Turkey with stuffing-Turkey will be brined in citric fruits, salt and water 4 days in the fridge while it thaws. Stuffing will be homemade with cranberries.
Ham-will be marinated in brown sugar, honey, maple syrup and water for 3 days while it thaws in the fridge.
Sweet Potatoes-Baked with brown sugar, maple syrup, nutmeg, cinnamon and topped with marshmallows. A diabetic’s guilty pleasure!
Mashed potatoes-Just plain with butter, milk, and chives
Mac and cheese-Baked with Cheddar and Munster cheeses, topped with bread crumbs for crispiness.
Desserts-All Homemade
Pumpkin Pie
Sweet Potato Pie
Carrot Cake-It’s two of my uncles birthdays and my daughter’s a few days later. As we have decided to play hooky for my daughter’s birthday to visit the aquarium, we will not be doing a big party. So we will celebrate all 3 on Thanksgiving.  
Oh and coleslaw and Hawaiian rolls. This is my stressor over the next 2 weeks and will continue until I have cleaned the kitchen Thanksgiving night. I will keep everyone posted on how it goes.
 
Class:
 Professor M. started our class off in a great way. He shared his daughter’s birth story. I love birth stories, babies and well most kids in general. He knew with us missing class last week we were behind, and I could sense his hesitancy in assigning the amount of work he did. We needed to get it done so we do not fall far behind. We spoke about topic sentences, needing a main idea, making a claim, and providing support. This is how each section should be laid out in our Room For Debate paper. We spoke about our sources and creditability. Some people may believe everything on the internet, especially Facebook, is true. Well unfortunately, it is not and we need to use reliable, creditable sources or it makes our papers as respectable as if there were no sources backing our topic.  We touched on fallacies and making overall statements. Mr. M spoke about weasel words to use like seems, plausible..ect. Our sections were explained in a sandwich metaphor. The top of the bun was to consist of a signal phrase, the meat of the sandwich was to give source material, and the bottom bun is to respond to oppositions of the idea. There were parts that we touched on about citing appropriately so we are not plagiarizing. I still do not know how to cite or create a bibliography. I have been working on educating myself in the different formats, as I have never used them before, and I am still lost. This is defiantly something I need to strengthen as myself and co-authors move towards our second draft. I am lucky enough to be with two classmates to share our ideas in co-authoring a paper with. As I said in my home life I am already stretched thin with time, and this week I spent a lot of time working with Art and Kylie on our collaboration. Kylie created a google doc and it saved us all a commute time of being able to work and interact in real time. Thanks Girly!!! We have argued topics, agreed, then completely disagreed with our own previous statement. I feel like the work we put in on this paper could actually become a solution starting point on gun control, and begin moving more towards the middle as a whole country. Not "I am Republican so leave my guns alone" or, "I am Democratic guns are destroying our children", but a common middle ground on background checks and mental health evaluations that could and should be put into legislation. As we did not have class last week the three of us agreed to write the paper by ourselves and meet to fit them into each other and create a collaborated paper. Once we read each other’s papers we knew we were stuck. Each paper was taken from a different perspective and backed by different sources. At that point we needed to pretty much tear up our papers and get the gun control topic sized down. The topic in itself is so controversial and has so many avenues. As Professor M heard us discussing, had to remind the three of us we are not writing a book. It was duly noted, and we chose to narrow our sights on background checks and mental health screens. If you have a moment read the paper it is compelling.
Until next time folks!!!!
 
 
 

​Week 9   Reflection
 
Home: This morning started unlike most Saturday mornings. Anthony did not have football today. So as I woke, I was happy to make my morning coffee and hop back into bed. Twilight Saga was showing all day on TV, and I drank the fragrant Folgers aroma in while slowly waking up. Most Saturday mornings are rushed and the moment my feet hit the floor I am off and running. My husband and I lay in the bed another 45 minutes alone before Grace woke. She seemed a little tired still, but was more than happy to accompany us under the toasty warm quilt. Around 10:30 am we started playing too rough for bed, and that signaled we all should started our day. My husband shaved and showered while Grace and I couldn’t find it in us to remove ourselves from under the quilt. After his shower he smelled and looked so good I figured it was my turn. Taking time to shower alone and enjoy the hot water trickling over my naked body, I thought of what today would bring, and how Grace would make out with her first real “trick or treating” experience. While I was preparing my face and hair for the day, daddy gave Grace a quick shower. We were all dressed and ready to walk out the door by noon. The three of us headed to the Amish market to grab some weekly essentials and maybe even a few treats that the Amish take time to handcraft. As we pulled into the parking lot we realized we were too late and hordes of people roamed in-between many parked vehicles. Scratch that idea, but hunger still threatened our sanity. My husband drove towards a location unknown to myself. I peeked back at my daughter to realize her eyes were getting very heavy and it was approaching nap time. I gently asked “What drive-through are we headed to?” He looked confused and said “None”. I tilted my heads towards the back seat of our truck for him to see our precious angel on the verge of sleep. He asked me to keep her awake as we continued the drive. I obliged by playing I spy and tickling her legs. We finally made it to our intended destination Lucky’s. I love this place they serve breakfast, lunch, dinner and alcohol all day. I thought asking for a Jack and Coke at 12:30 pm might be a bit much so coffee it was. Grace did not want to eat or drink anything. I was happy I had asked the hostess for a booth, because she settled down on her left hand side with daddy’s phone and her pink jacket over top of her. We were served quickly and our food was out within 10 minutes. Constantly asking Grace if she wanted bacon, eggs, scrapple or any other item on me and her father’s plate she declined drowsily. We considered the fact that we were all up very late and maybe she was just worn out. Hey, even as adults we have lazy days where we don’t want to be bothered. Taking my first bite of the second half of my scrapple, egg, and cheese sandwich Grace lifted her head and became interested in the OJ the server brought for her. She hopped up in daddy’s lap and took one sip. I looked at her and smiled and I saw it happening before it did. She shrugged her shoulders as though the convulsion came from the pit of her stomach. Before a second had passed she spewed vomit all over our table, all over herself and daddy too. Daddy had quickly grabbed her pink coat and held it over her mouth as she continued to vomit. I hopped up, interrupted a conversation between our waiter and a co-worker with a quick “I need the check, and bar towels too.” I went back to our booth grabbed Grace and ran out the door. I did not want her to throw up on anyone else or their food. She seemed a little better once outside in the cool air. Only then did I notice she was completely drenched in her own stomach juices. Daddy came walking out the door and unlocked the truck. I grabbed two plastic trash bags, an extra towel I keep just in case, and headed into the back seat with my baby to be driven like Miss Daisy. Took her vomit soaked clothes off and wrapped her in the towel. As we drove home my husband informed me that our breakfast was $40, which meant the server received 62% tip. Oh well kids get sick and no one in the restaurant made us feel any other way. He also informed me he could feel the throw up soaking through his shirt. Grace fell asleep quickly. We got home and my husband put Grace to bed. I grabbed our bathroom trash can, cleaned it out with Lysol, and also grabbed a roll of toilet paper. This man still covered in vomit was tucking his little girl in as I entered the room with supplies and a sippy cup. She was out and all future weekend plans are shut down as of now. I do not think I will take her trick or treating tonight, which stinks because Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. Oh well, the life of dedicated parents. I guess I will sit here and bang on this keyboard until my angel calls for mommy. Hope everyone else has a great one.

Class: This week’s class was intense however, Professor Mangini continued to show us he is a person just like any of us with sharing his daughter Elise’s second birthday pictures. She is absolutely adorable and he and his wife are very blessed to have her. A statement was made by Mr. M that bothered me a little, that statistics show what a student leans in one class is seldom brought to another. I do not know if I have fell victim to this statistic or not, but concerns me as we continue to analyze education. Blog assignments were discussed and blog 15 is optional, which obviously means I will complete. I am excited for blog 16 as this could be the frame work for the Room For Debate paper. I am an excellent arguer and for many years thought law was where I belonged. However, due to injustices during the OJ Simpson trial, I chose not to follow that path….Yea I am that old that I watched the trial and was interested. The true meaning of credentials was address as far as what makes a person’s opinion valid on any given subject. We also discussed rhetoric and rhetorical situations. The issue with rhetoric is there are many ways to define it.  Rhetoric, defined for the purpose of our class, is an effective means of communication. It was mentioned that it can also be described in part as an art of persuasion. Great philosophers such as Socrates and Plato have developed specific elements of rhetorical situations:

1. Logos- Logic or reasoning, actual content of speech, organized. Text
2. Ethos-Creditability or trustworthiness. Reflecting character.
3. Pathos-Emotional appeal, appealing to audiences sensibilities and audience perspectives
4. Telos-Attitude of speech. Purpose
5. Kairos-Setting of context.

There are also 5 canons to a rhetorical situation:

1. Invention-Creation of ideas
2. Arrangement-How the topic is organized
3. Style-How you communicate, tone, genre
4. Memory-Spoken word memorization as well as how things can change
5. Delivery-How do you get it out there

If you can master both the elements and canons in your writing you can then think of yourself proficient in the art of rhetoric, but without the credentials to back it up you are then considered irrelevant. I have also heard the word double entendra many times in my life, but now understand it a little better. It is a literary device of 2 meanings. I am hoping during this class I become more comfortable with the ideas being fluid. We also discussed a rhetorical triangle and how the perspective of text can play in many ways. Is it up to the audience to bring the meaning of the text out, a negation between audience and writer, or what the writer means from the written text? See the idea is fluid depending on what perspective one aims to gain. I really like the TPS approach to writing a thesis statement. Topic Position and Support. If done correctly it should promise the reader you say XXX because XXX and it is proven by XXX. This will really help me with organization in my future papers and staying on topic. Sometimes my over exaggerated details take me on a tangent that leaves the reader wondering where the hell I am going. We also touched on basic essay structure of our next paper. Professor M. teaches and gives examples of situations college students understand. He spoke about dating multiple people at once. I myself have done this in the past. He said to act like each point is a different date to avoid other points AKA dates from entering conversation during the others date. For example: If you’re at lunch with Ben and thinking about a dinner date with Dan you are not going to mention it to Ben. For that fact you are not going to mention to Ben or Dan that you plan to end your night with John. The idea is to give each point it’s deserved developed time. I also learned during this class that the transitional sentence belongs in the next point’s paragraph, not the end of the other. BOOOMMM mind blown. I am very excited to start our room for debate paper. I am going to be collaborating with two others who I believe will only advance the readers experience while we discuss one of societies hot topics currently. Stay tuned all it will be great!!!

Reflection 7
Since my 1800 word AMA project took me nearly 10 minutes to read we continued our class starting with the last few individuals to do their informal presentation.
 Julie went first for the night and she explained how she has both a fixed and growth mindset depending on the environment. At school she is quiet and does not want to ask many questions and at home she is open to new things. Most of her examples were from her past so she received great feedback as to develop the now moments. Great start just needs a sharper focus.
Anna was next and she blew my mind. Literally I felt like I was in one of the commercials where the purple poof comes from the person’s head. She explained in detail the differences between choleric, sanguine, phlegmatic, and melancholy personalities. It detailed how with her phlegmatic personality others may view her as stupid or slow. She used great word choices in her persuasive piece. A critique that I hope she develops is what kind of environment people with phlegmatic identity flourish in as she referenced it twice, as well as showing her adaption to the world a little better.  
Following was John and I really like his approach to this. All semester we as a class have been persuaded by Mr. Mangini to appeal more so to a growth mindset and declare that a fixed is inferior. John’s approached left many stunned for this pure fact. In his paper he is going to prove why in his opinion having a fixed mindset is just as self-serving as a growth. He did not read but I did however write a quote from him “Huge part of me, unraveling myself and putting back together”. He wants to show how far he has come with a fixed mindset as he identifies closely with the ideology. I hope he sticks to this and does not change to appease anyone but himself.
Kayleigh hit some heart strings. She focused on her own depression disorder and the struggles she had as a young women being told the medication treatment options. She also linked the depression to having a fixed mindset. I wonder Kayleigh, have you found any research in the field? She linked it as she discovered a growth mindset and flashed back to a time of despair. That was truly moving and a pronounced writer move. She received such criticisms of re-arrangement and focusing on one or two school incidents. Her transitions were great with the simplicity of her sentence structure and word choice.
Briahna followed and I felt very lost. Maybe due to the fact I have not read any of her writings as I have other classmates. Her intro was a little rough and she spoke about failing an AP Chemistry class. She was given suggestions to show her adaption a little stronger and make it clearer. “Tie it up in a little bow lifetime style”.
The first and only person in the class to choose the topic of how to raise a child with a growth mindset is Luis, who has no children. He used examples like when the child starts walking and falls pick them up, and always being present. I do the same as a parent for two children and did not think that is how once installs a growth mindset in raising a child. However, as we headed towards the end of his paper he brought his own father into the scenario. From here something special emerges. He showed truth and emotion. Many classmates felt it did not display a fix or growth mindset and using tools to adapt. I hope he continues with his father’s story and I know it may be painful. Any young man not being with a father day to day. One can burry those feelings deep down inside and when they come around who knows where it will land.
Next, was my main chick Kylie and her focus was on transitioning into college while facing a debilitating illness. Dan gave a great saying “I am not my illness”. Here paper was written well and just needed a little work on transitions and her adaption to having the illness. She is showing how she is doing things differently this time around with notes (oh crap did I send her notes this week? I think I did) and voice recorders. However, it is not giving a world view? I don’t even understand how a world view could be taken from it. Good luck. She did get a really good idea to focus at the first set of symptoms and tell the story from there.
Last, but not least was Lin. I took amazingly awesome notes for him and did not for myself. He wrote about coming to America from China and the struggles he faced in a new county with a language he barely spoke, let alone understood. He used podcasts to help learn English and studied double time to keep up with his first American college experience. Then he moves into to tell us how he failed, and instead of using the failure and running back to China. He stays. He grows. He tries again. His journey is powerful and moving.
Our class was also giving a vote to decide when we will receive our blog post 13 and 14. The majority of the class voted to take a break through the mid-term period and jump back in. However, me being the argumentative individual began to worry when he said two seconds before when we get back to class from mid-term conversations we are jumping straight into our Room For Debate project. I know in the first class Professor M. crossed research paper from the list of required writings, but this is the substitution for that cross off. I felt strongly about having the two blog posts assigned and explained to my class the reasoning. Low and behold the majority leaned toward having them assigned and a good chunk have them completed. I was nostalgic when he discussed what blog 13 will be all about. To watch the Democratic debate, draw out an issue or two, speak about what the candidates state, and what your personal stance is on it. Even though they all have different view points on guns they are all in favor of restriction as Democrats. So I figured I would at least get a good argumentative piece from the assignment.
Also, our websites were address as their progress will be a big part of our mid-term grade. Having a writer’s identity portrayed in our choice of backgrounds was address. Therefore I chose to change my theme more so towards the struggles of writing and women who have struggled with writing. I also realized since I completely changed my AMA project, I needed to update my prologue and epilogue. Mr. Mangini requested at least two drafts I am now lingering around twelve with three posted.
Closing the class we discussed what our mid-term grade would be based on and how our work will pretty much do the talking. Also requested was an elevator pitch. A one page, quick writing of what grade we believe we have earned and why. I have contemplated the last 6 weeks on how to go about mine. I wanted to see what grade he wanted to give me then either agree and show why or disagree and show why. However, Professor M. wants them to him no later than 6pm on Wednesday 10/21/15 in preparation for our conferences the following day. I submitted mine yesterday fully confident in the grade requested. I sure hope my confidence was not false.
 
 

Courtney N. Huff                                                                                                             English Comp 100
Reflection 6
Class: This week in class we were given a bonus blog and I cannot wait to do the step by step process for posting a YouTube video. It took me around 3 hours to figure out how to do this and link it to my page. Personally, I watched videos at 2.5 hours of frustration to figure out how to do it, so I hope it helps a future student who chooses to take risks and do something they have not done before.  Professor M. touched on what to expect next week as we begin to prepare for our mid-term conferences. He also asked us to view and navigate our Weebly websites as guest in preparation as this will be a big part of the discussion. Making sure links work and others are able to find the next thing with ease. I want to go and revise all the blogs I have completed thus far, but then worry that my process will not be fully shown as I pitch what grade I think I deserve. Starting down from the top of the list we were able to read our AMA projects, as well as be spectators to offer criticism in a respectful way.  There were 3 options given to read out loud and have a seat, read and lead the criticism with questions addressing your own paper and have audience answer, or to read and react which was read and let the class offer their input without prompting. I chose to read and react. While reading, I first realized that 1800 words may be a bit much and was definitely a mouth full. I tripped over a few words as I normally read in a whisper to myself. I received great feedback from the class and I feel as now I know where my revisions for draft 2 need to start. I also took notes for Art and Dan as they did their presentations. We negotiated the note taking as Mr. M wanted to have the next person in line take notes on the criticisms received, I offered for the person sitting next to them. We were two to a row besides Dan who was in front of me alone, so I offered to take his notes.  With Melissa’s I had wrote the word “puppeteer” as she used in her paper. That word was descriptive and provided imagery. She completed both with only one word and that was awesome to see and made me think of my own word choices. I had not read Ben’s and he chose not to read rather summarize his AMA project.  The emotion that showed while he spoke, in front of a class that he has only known a few weeks, as a man, was amazing to see. I knew I had to read it. I did so today at the first opportunity and sent him an e-mail with a few thought provoking questions. Zach did his and I wrote a note of “too much pride”. The pride he placed in his paper did not exhibit a growth mindset in my opinion.  He received really good feedback from the class and I can’t wait to see where he takes it. I wonder will he choose a new topic or keep the original and revise.  I want to challenge myself to have my second draft done by class next week and closer to 1,000 words. Side note-at this stage of the game, if someone offers criticism and cannot explain why, don’t disregard their feedback, but understand they are still trying to figure out why your writing made them feel that way.
 
Home: I can’t help feeling the internal need for alone time with my man. It is hard to even sneak kisses in front of the kids, as they get in the middle of our legs and push us apart. We are going shooting at the range on Sunday, and hopefully my mother will watch both of my heathens so we can use practice time as our version of a date. Work is interesting more so as I close out this day. I am not as far up the ladder as some of my colleagues, but one in particular is causing conflict with the way I run this practice. He is an echo tech, director of echoes to be exact, and his laziness is consuming him so to the point it is now interfering with the way our office cares for patients. When you affect my patients with your choices I will sure state my standpoint no matter how much higher you are then me. I feel I internalize my work too much. For example, I constantly say my office, my doctors, my staff, my patients. I see this as mine before Penn’s. I am not sure currently if that is a good thing, or a bad thing, but I feel I need to meet more in the middle before I get in something my years of loyalty and exemplary service may not cover. I need to do something different this weekend besides sit at my house, play with the kids, grocery shop, worry about my writing and house work. A scene change might be good for my mental health.
 

I have delayed in posting this video, which was due by yesterday. I was not emotionally ready to deal with the "I am so sorry for your loss" and "If I can do anything to help" that most people give in a time of a loved ones death. After class last night I realized this is my safe space to be venerable. I understand not posting my reflection last week may weigh negatively during my mid-term and final. This is the first deadline I was unable to make, and frankly I am happy with myself that it is going up now and not 3 more days later after services.

Courtney Huff                                    English Comp 100
Reflection Week 4

Home: I am having feelings of being very overwhelmed this week. Trying to wrap my head around not being able to be everything to everyone I continue to try and blame my short comings on my sickness. I finally broke down last night. Fighting back tears has been an issue with me since I was a child. I always thought crying was a sign of weakness, therefore I chose not to. My husband came home last night with our son and dinner from Seasons. Embracing him as normal for a hug and kiss, I wrapped my arms around that man and could not let go. Weeping in an uncontrollable way he just held me. My focus has been school, work, the kids and their schooling I have found myself putting him on the back burner. We have been friends for over 16 years and in love for the last 8. I know he is not going anywhere, but my mind likes to dance around in its own way. Come up with situations that do not exist, then I put false narratives into my own reality. I know he loves me and supports me with everything, but a man who has little to no attention will seek attention where it can be found. In his assuring way, he grabbed me and told me I need to relax. I took his advice and spent the night with him and the kids. A friend of our family has a property that has a huge pond. In that pond lives the biggest, most beautifully colored coy fish I have ever seen. Some with black and white markings, others with the brightest orange and white, one even looks like a tiger with his stripes. There are also two pre-historic large turtles. We have taking on the responsibility of feeding them twice daily while he is recuperating in the hospital. After dinner we packed up both kids and dog and took the 5 minute drive. The house sits back in a no way out road. As you enter you see two houses on the side, each with dogs barking. My Remy girl did great. She did not bark back, but almost clobbered my son who I let sit in the way back with her. We pull over the little bridge and looking over the acers of land, with the fall sun setting over the big oak trees I could feel myself letting go a little. Almost like a physical feeling of the stress coming out of the top of my body and my shoulders feeling lighter. We played on the property till well after dark. Anthony and Grace caught a bull frog, we played tag, and enjoyed being together as a family. Myself and Grace decided to hide from Ant behind 3 large pines, he let Remy go and she sniffed us out with the speed of light. Packing everyone back in the car, Anthony and Remy choose the same seating arrangement in the way back and Grace became adamant that she was sitting in the back. For those of you who have dealt with a 2 year old little girl you will understand it was not easy to convince her that she should sit in her seat. You know what, the hell with it, she can sit in the back. For that fact so will mommy, you know to make sure everyone is safe. All in all I needed those moments. I felt so much better after taking some time just to be with my family who I feel I have been neglecting recently. Work has been interesting with the Papal visit. Our mother office in Presbyterian Hospital has been closed and I have been lucky enough to house two of the best nurses we have. I was having a conversation with Sandy our congestive heart failure nurse looking for insight on where I want my education to land me. Either finishing my BSN or getting bachelors in healthcare management. She thinks I should go for management as I have been running my office for the last 6 years. An interesting topic did present itself in a discussion we were having. As this was Sandy’s first visit to the Media office since it opened 15 years ago she was questioning what else was housed in the building. I let her know a large Penn internal medicine was upstairs, and Penn Good Shepherds physical therapy was in the suite adjacent from us. There was a hearing health care in another suite, which at that point Sandy asked why it was closed. I informed her that the woman who ran it was in a fatal accident and the suite was now unoccupied. We both seemed to have an unannounced moment of silence. I then moved in for an idea I have been very passionate about for the last few months since the suite becoming available. In our office we are equipped to do routine stress testing and stress echoes, but we have no nuclear cardiology. Being as our office is in Main Line jurisdiction and not in Penn territory it is hard to get this specific study in our network when ordered by our physicians. Don’t get me wrong, I have my die hard Penn patients who will go to our Radnor location, Valley Forge or even to Philadelphia. For the most part we hand Riddle Memorial and Lankenau most of our studies. So I presented the idea to Sandy to rent that space for us to begin to do nuclear cardiology. Offering nuclear stress tests would not only be more money generated by our site, but also more convenient for patients who want Penn care without the travel to Philadelphia. Well Sandy gave me a huge ego boost and thought it was amazing. She gave me some ideas on how to present it to our Chief cardiologist as well as our CEO and Director of Outpatient Operations. I think this might actually become a reality as long as I can prove the financial outcome and trying to figure out how to fix my budget to handle the initial startup costs. Another project to get myself completely wrapped up in and overwhelmed. It will be a work in progress, but my patients will be so much better off with care Penn offers vs the Main Line….YEA I SAID IT!!! Also, I have a headache for more than a week. I wonder if my brain is creating new neuropathways being generated by assignments from this class. HMMM

Class: Being present at this week’s class was not as easy as normal. If you refer to my blog post Mindset Video Notes..I Want My Metaphoric Cookie and read the comments hopefully it will be understandable. We did however drive the class more from a student centering vs the teacher. It was very exciting because Mr. M had discussed this as one of the ways he teachers. He was quiet, I will not state silent because he grunted, clapped, snapped, and when I told him I knew what he was doing because I read the other classes blogs he even let a laugh escape. His method was described on the board as disrupting the fixed pattern of a college classroom. I believe he accomplished his task by communicating with us in a non-verbal way. Our class rocks because we all got it and had class without Mr. M having to verbally instruct. I will thank whoever behind me on the sixty second clock. We watched Growth Mindset vs. Fixed Mindset and then he put on a YouTube clock of 60 seconds. UMMMMM what. I  started looking under my desk, at the closest trash like what the hell is that count down for. Then an angel behind me yelled out “free write” and then it started. I hope I am not the only one who had no clue on this one. This continued through the other videos we were assigned to watch for out blog on mindsets last week. Well we did not watch all of them and my notes were left at home so I was scrambling trying to remember what I watched and what I wrote. The things Mr. M questioned were not what I took notes on. For example who were the speakers on Ted Talk and why was it important that we need to listen to what they say. My notes were more on the subject of growth vs fixed mindsets. I am still learning to question my world and want the knowledge I obtained. For example Mr. M said the word Socratic Method. Here is another element to this class I am going to have to look up is the first thing I thought. However, I wrote the spelling to the best of my ability (it was wrong) and googled in my first moment of free time. I am happy that I did it is a method to teach critical thinking. Not just in a critical thinking class, but how to become a critical thinker and question the world around me. I will most defiantly do more research on this. My mind is currently stuck on the problem-posing part of Paulo Freire Banking Concept. I still cannot get a firm grasp on that and how it links to having a growth mindset. I seem to look at growth mindsets more as an act in that time vs a person’s outlook in general.  Mr. M did shed a little light on this as we discussed my I believe. I thought I found my topic on the Adaptive Mindset paper because of the passion created while doing my I believe. Turns out I might have to re-evaluate due to the center I have in my mind does not exist in reality and it does not show a growth mindset. I need to work on a better grasp of the two. In the beginning of class, we took a survey based on our mindset. I answered strongly as growth. I do however wonder if that survey were presented for us to take on the first day would my answers have been as strong? Maybe they would have been the exact same, but with the knowledge Mr. M has laid on us with his position through arrangement of his articles I feel it may have swayed my level of agreement to some degree. Feeling slightly fearful of revising my blog on the banking concept, I am glad for it to be assigned. I did not have a firm grasp on the reading and information presented and researched. I am hoping with the information I have now a better writer will shine through the words I will give. When I get stuck I’m calling Art. He has his head wrapped around the concept and I see him connecting the problem posing with the growth mindset. Art is defiantly my main man. I think him and myself took off when commenting was actually assigned for our class. COME ON GUYS LETS HELP EACH OTHER. Art is above me on our classes list and he had to read my mindset and comment. As it happened for me, it must have happened for him too, attention was grabbed and before I knew it we were all over each other’s writing. We even devised a plan to come out of our security in the class and sit next to quieter individuals and really get this class rocking. A page for our class, created by our class, and managed by our class may be coming soon. We have to work out the who, what, when, where, and whys first. Finally, context was discussed. I am personally guilty of just hitting bullet points with my past two reflections. As I let loose on my keyboard this week, I felt like I could actually breathe. Almost like I have typed away some of my aggression I have been holding. I feel kind of liberated as I end for this week! I seem to be following my steps from My Writing Process. I am at my desk in a quiet, dimly lit room. Coffee at my left and note books at the right. Making sure I have enough time to get the creative juices flowing. I did get a chance to use electronics as I wanted. It did help pushing the button on my phone to voice record then play later while writing. Efforts are really being given towards Mr. M’s process. I want to be a great writer, and when I get that one story I want to maybe have it published. 

Courtney N. Huff                                                                                                                       English Comp 100

Week 2    Reflection

My home week has been quite hectic. Kyle has started working on the opposite shift, so Monday through Thursday I feel like a single mother. Damn I give you women credit. Grace started playschool for the first time, and that has been mentally exhausting. Every morning before 8:00am hearing your baby cry, kick, and scream for you can take a toll on the mind. All the while I have to run a busy cardiac office. After her drop off, I wipe away the tears and game face forward. We are lucky enough that my mother needed us as much as we needed her currently. She is able to put Anthony on the bus in the mornings. I just have to get him ready enough to walk out the door. My husband has been great on his 3 days off though. The laundry is complete again without my assistance, and he put on our new garage door. He is amazing to me. The difference in two years of our home is miraculous. Other than the normal day to day hustle, Grace caught a cold this week and is currently running a fever. I hope I do not have to call out tomorrow. I have 22 patients on the books. Everything happens for a reason, I might actually need a day starting to feel pretty crappy myself.

Parent Problems!!!

In class my professor still has my complete attention. This week we tied up loose ends on our websites and were able to get any last updating questions answered. He helped us with the banking concept vs. problem posing. I kind of wish we could have had the time to do what the day classes did by working in groups. More writing process was spoken in class, and I actually followed it at home. I was in the shower Thursday night thinking about my I believe article. Ideas were flowing. I am not sure if it was the hot water touching my tired body after a long day, or the excitement I have about the I Believe assignment, but I showered grabbed a notebook and jotted down some ideas. In the writing process Mr. M is showing us it’s not just sitting and typing, but giving your mind time to work through the logistics. I did take the process to a level that was not comfortable for me. I had my husband read and critique My Mindset assignment. Boy oh boy did he do that. With a blue color pencil in hand, he pulled himself away from Craigslist (truck shopping) to be there for me. He defiantly helped me work through some wording. It felt good to let someone else look at my work and understand the message I was sending. Mr. M promises if we work through the process our skills of writing will show our work in the end. I guess I will keep on working.